Until the Day I Die
by ashenrenee
Summary: I'll love you until the day I die, he'd said, and he did, he loved James for two more weeks after that night. Regulus/James One Shot. Warning: Slash


**Hey guys! So this is a little one shot that I did for the Death Eater Express Drabble Game. The prompt was Regulus Black, a Marauder, a broken wand, muffliato, and Snape.**

 **Thank you to ash-castle who beta read this for me, you're the best!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, this is JK Rowling's sandbox, I'm just building castles.**

 **Thank you for reading and please remember to feed the magical review eating fairy!** **Also this is my first attempt at smut, ever, and it happens to be slash so, please be kind in your reviews.**

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It had been too long since they had seen each other. Regulus was restless, pacing up and down the narrow corridor in front of the door to the dingy motel room where the love of his life was waiting for him. He didn't know why he was so nervous, well, he did, but it didn't make any sense. Just because he hadn't seen James since he'd graduated the year before didn't mean that things had changed that much.

Well, that wasn't true either. Things _had_ changed, irrevocably even, but his heart hadn't changed, and despite his recent marriage to Lily, James' heart hadn't changed either. Or had it? He wouldn't agree to meet Regulus here if he didn't love him anymore, would he? _There's only one way to find out_ , Regulus thought bitterly, stopping his pacing and stepping forward to knock on the door.

The door swung open after three heartbeats, Regulus knew because he counted, and there he was. James. Looking just as perfect as he always had, his hair an utter disaster, his hazel eyes wide and filled with what Regulus was sure must be relief. _Relief_. If that didn't mean something, if it wasn't a sign that James still loved him than Regulus didn't know what was.

They stared at each other, both of them breathing hard for no other reason that the sight of one another took their breath away and they were fighting desperately to get it back.

"I thought..." James started, reaching out to brush a lock of Regulus' hair out of his face. "I didn't think you would come." Regulus took a deep breath and opened his mouth to speak, but he closed it again almost instantly, realizing that he didn't know what to say.

The man he loved was standing in front of him and _he didn't know what to say._ So he took a step forward, closing the door behind him with a flick of his wand before capturing James' face in both of his hands and pressing a desperate kiss to his lips.

James let out a groan and his arms wound themselves around Regulus' waist, pulling him closer as Regulus deepened the kiss. Their tongues moved together in familiar, practiced motions, years of snogging in broom cupboards and shagging in abandoned classrooms having taught them exactly what to do to push each other higher.

Somehow- though later Regulus wouldn't be able to say how- they ended up across the room and on the bed, frantically pulling at each other's clothing, desperate to have as much skin on skin contact as possible.

Regulus would never get over what it felt like to touch James. It was something so forbidden, so sinful that he could hardly fathom that some higher power did not strike him down for daring to touch something so pure.

It took them longer than it should have to undress, later Regulus would vaguely remember the sound of ripping fabric, of buttons popping free and scattering across the room, his favorite shirt ruined and he wouldn't be able to bring himself to care because the feeling of his naked chest pressed against James' made it more than worth it. James shifted the kiss so that he was kissing and nipping his way down Regulus' neck and then Regulus' hand was wrapped around James' cock, stroking it just the way he remembered that James liked best.

"Oh Gods, _Reg_ ," James moaned. His voice was like ambrosia and Regulus tightened his grip and stroked him harder, desperate for the sounds he knew that James could make. Regulus shifted slightly, spreading James' legs wide and murmuring a quick, wandless lubrication spell before sliding two fingers into his lover's tight opening.

"I've missed you James," Regulus murmured, his fingers brushing against James' prostate, making his eyes roll back in his head as he moaned and canted his hips uncontrollably. "I've missed this, you, _us_ , so much."

"Please," James begged. "Reg, please." Regulus smirked and kept doing what he did best, driving James higher and higher with the steady stroke of one hand and the brutal finger fucking with the other.

"Did you miss me James?" Regulus asked crooking his fingers slightly.

"Yes," James panted, his eyes glazing over. "Reg please, fuck me, _please_."

"Tell me you missed me," Regulus demanded.

"So much," James groaned. "I missed you so fucking much." Regulus withdrew his fingers and lined his cock up with James' opening, making sure to make eye contact with him as he slid in slowly, gasping at how tight he was. It'd been so long, _too_ long, and Regulus knew he wasn't going to last.

"I love you," Regulus blurted as he began thrusting slowly, his hand around James' cock moving in tandem with his thrusts. He wasn't sure what made him say it, they'd never said it before, not once in the past three years they had been fucking each other. Maybe it was the finality of it all, the knowledge of James' marriage and Regulus' alliance to the Dark Lord, the indescribable feeling deep in the pit of Regulus' stomach that this was the _last time_ that made him admit to the secret he'd been harboring for years.

James stared up at him with wide eyes, his mouth opening and closing as he tried to form a coherent response. "Reg-" he moaned loudly his eyes squeezing shut as Regulus picked up the pace, fucking him harder. "Reg, please, faster," he begged and Regulus complied, setting a brutal, almost painful pace.

"James," Regulus gasped, his eyelids fluttering as he neared the edge of his orgasm.

" _Regulus!_ " James groaned as he came, his ejaculation coating Regulus' hand. Regulus thrust three more times before following James over the edge, shouting his name and spilling his seed inside of him. Regulus pulled out and collapsed on the bed next to James, breathing erratically.

"Did you say you love me?" James asked a few minutes later, still sounding slightly breathless. "Because I could have sworn-"

"I did," Regulus said, interrupting whatever rant it was that James was about to start. "I do, I love you." He turned his head to meet James' eyes, his heart hammering in his chest. "I wanted you to know, because I... because we... James this can't happen again." Regulus watched as James sucked in a shaky breath, as his eyes closed and he swallowed hard against the tears that escaped in spite of his efforts to stop them.

"I think I knew you were going to say that," James admitted, his eyes opening. Regulus fought back his own tears as he stood up and began searching the room for his torn clothing, cursing when he discovered that in their haste to get to the bed one of them had stepped on his wand and broken it. "I love you too," James told him once he was fully dressed in his ripped shirt and wrinkled trousers.

Regulus froze where he stood, in front of the door with his hand outstretched to turn the knob. He closed his eyes and felt the tears he'd been holding back spill over onto his cheeks. He shouldn't do it, he knew before his body even began to turn around that he should just leave. But one moment he was facing the door and the next moment he was kissing James again, for the last time and he could feel every cell in his body protesting that very thought. _It was the last time._

"I'll love you until the day I die," Regulus breathed, pulling away and practically running out the door and down the corridor. It wasn't until he was outside and well down the street that Regulus stopped, slipping into an alley before casting a wandless _muffliato_ and breaking down into great shuddering sobs.

That was how Severus found him hours later, sitting on the ground in the middle of an alley in muggle London, weeping and grasping his broken wand in one hand and clutching at his chest, just above his equally broken heart, with the other.


End file.
